The Risk of Being Happy, an Introduction

Hello, everyone.

First off I would like to say that the title is not a depressing as it may seem, it's from a quote by Robert Anthony: "Most people would rather be certain they're miserable, than risk being happy."  Depressing right?

I'm not here to try and make people feel bad, but I will admit to myself and all of you in the blogging world that I'm more certain that I am miserable and the idea of being happy is a far off thought.

Many of you may know me (from DA or in real life, lucky you) but I'm guessing that there are some chances that some of you don't know me.  So, short intro time.

My name is Michelle, and my interweb persona is Ame (derived from my common username AmethystHeart).  I am not popular and I'm not amazing.  But I am a 21-year-old who's this close to being a college graduate.  I should make this a video blog, because clearly you cannot see me pinching my fingers together when I say "this close".  But I am.  And I have one more year left, so therefore I am a senior, and with luck of finishing all the required classes the lovely Indiana University, I will not have the pleasure of being a fifth-year senior.  Anyways (and I use this word a lot), as I come up to this final year of being with the best people (or rather person) I've ever met, taking dramatically difficult chemistry classes that may not matter in the future and living with my sister (and when I say I will miss her desperately so, I know it sounds like she's dying, but I promise she's not, I just hate being apart from the singular person I tell everything to), I realize that there are a lot of things I'm not happy about with regards to my life led thus far.  They range from the mundane, like my enormously outdated wardrobe to the more important things like being less needy in my friendships and getting back to my desired 125 lb weight.

So why the blog, Ame?
I'm not good at guilt tripping myself if I fail at something I've set a goal for.  Like The Experiment, which I will post about later, which on several occasions failed for one singular reason.  I feel like if I have to share my failures or successes, I will be more likely to succeed because who likes sharing failure.  I of course, will share failure (like if The Experiment doesn't work again) and I won't be happy to share them, but everyone fails in their goals, otherwise we would never grow and I want to grow.

Anyways, (see told you, there's that word again) I will leave you with this tad of info.  I'm sure in the coming days, you will learn more about who I am since I really hate taking about my personality in long-winded amounts.  I find it taxing to do, which is why I fear writing a resume, personal statement and CV, it's unhumbling.  Enough about me, onto my happiness project.